Last week, I hit a pretty big low. Doubts filled my mind about whether God is using this depression for good in my life. As I thought of the road ahead and imagined how many more times I might struggle with depression based on how many times I have in the past, it felt like…
Author: Marissa
Tell Everyone?
“Sing a new song to the Lord! Let the whole earth sing to the Lord! Sing to the Lord; praise His name. Each day proclaim the good news that he saves! Publish his glorious deeds among the nations. Tell everyone about the amazing things he does.” Psalm 96:1-3 Each day– that means every day. Every…
When the Road Seems Long
I am in that place again. If you think you are alone, know that I am with you in the trenches. That this blog is written not from a place of standing looking back on memories, but from experiencing firsthand the grip depression can have. I wish it was different. Because right now, my faith…
Do You Have Ongoing Depression Symptoms? You Might Have This
Many medical conditions can mimic or mask themselves as depression. There is one that we stumbled upon years ago: It all started with a problem with our oldest son, Dawson. From the time he turned two, it seemed like there were moments that he would go from being a happy little guy to out-of-control screaming…
Does Anyone Understand?
The welcomed sun shines brightly on this spring day in Alaska but inside I am sad. I know this feeling all too well. That old familiar ache in my heart that has returned in recent weeks. I wish it would go away. Why do I have to struggle with depression? Jim says this time of…
Irreplaceable
The dark thought I struggled with the most over the years and especially during my postpartum depression is “everyone would be better off without me.” Or another one like it, “I would be doing everyone a favor if I was gone.” Or “Someone else would be a better mom to my kids.” All these years…
“What does it look like when you have PMDD?”
“What does your PMDD look like?” I was asked this question recently and I thought it might be helpful if I described what I feel like when I experience PMDD, or Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. It occurs one or two days out of the month around my cycle. (Sometimes it is more days but it can…
Harder Than It Needs to Be (a poem)
Sometimes I get inspired to write poetry. I wrote this poem this afternoon after a discouraging morning of battling self, sin, and too many thoughts of defeat. It’s not easy to put this out there in cyberspace. If I’m honest, it’s just a little beyond my comfort zone, but here it goes: Concerning how we…
10 Things that Helped Me Heal from Past Sexual Abuse
(This story is a continuation of my post from yesterday: Healing from Past Trauma, My Story. You’ll want to read that first if you haven’t.) Since that night in October when God answered those prayers and finally showed me what had been keeping me in bondage, I began the road to healing: First, I stopped…
Healing from Past Trauma- My Story
While not everyone’s experience is the same, I found my depression to be directly connected to something traumatic from my past I unknowingly carried around. Our first spring living in Alaska, depression afflicted me in probably the worst way it ever has. Although my first fall and winter in Alaska went well for me emotionally,…